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43 OY{"id":11273,"date":"2020-05-15T02:30:32","date_gmt":"2020-05-14T23:30:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/uriesblog.ro\/?p=11273"},"modified":"2020-05-15T02:30:38","modified_gmt":"2020-05-14T23:30:38","slug":"declafractia-ma-tii-stiu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/uriesblog.ro\/declafractia-ma-tii-stiu\/","title":{"rendered":"Declafrac\u021bia m\u0103-tii, \u0219tiu!"},"content":{"rendered":"\nM\u0103 opre\u0219te mutulic\u0103. Declafrac\u021bie ave\u021bi? Da, zic. Merg s\u0103 cump\u0103r ni\u0219te pemp\u0103r\u0219i. De mo\u0219negi. 5 aprilie. Eu am scris patru. Mor\u021bii \u0219i r\u0103ni\u021bii, eu a\u0219a am crezut! C\u0103-i 4 aprilie. C\u0103c\u0103narul, nu-i bine, e cinci. A\u0219a, \u0219i? Eu am crezut, toat\u0103 ziua c\u0103-i 4. Nu-i patru, nu sunte\u021bi \u00een regul\u0103. Zicea-i c\u0103-i hitlerist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Serios?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Un ni\u0219te unul pe care l-a \u00eembr\u0103cat statul \u00een uniform\u0103 \u0219i care nici m\u0103car nu \u0219tie c\u0103 diferen\u021ba dintre o cifr\u0103 \u0219i-o via\u021b\u0103 nu se m\u0103soar\u0103 \u00een declara\u021bii \u00een care po\u021bi s\u0103 scrii absolut ce vrei. Problema celor care l-au educat? EMPATIA. \u0218i ce s\u0103 fac, zic? Merge\u021bi acas\u0103 \u0219i face-\u021bi alt\u0103 declara\u021bie cu ziua de azi. S\u0103 mori tu, covidit?! P\u0103i acas\u0103 m\u0103 duc, nu mai ies afar\u0103 dec\u00e2t cu ciob\u0103nescul, p\u0103 sar\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Rupe\u021bi \u0219i arunca\u021bi declara\u021bia aia acum la gunoi. Nu v-am amendat. Dar, mergi \u0219i f\u0103-\u021bi alta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ai sesizat? Trecerea asta de la futu-v\u0103-n gur\u0103 la futu-te-n gur\u0103, la unii micropoli\u021bai e at\u00e2t de mic\u0103 \u00eenc\u00e2t asteroizi zgubilitici care alearg\u0103 de nebuni prin univers se opresc \u0219i fac \u0219oc anafilactic. Acum te fut, acum v\u0103 fut. Fut\u0103cio\u0219i.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
P\u0103i acas\u0103 m\u0103 duc, dar a\u0219tept pe cineva. Nu conteaz\u0103, groh\u0103ie uniformizatul pulii. P\u0103i c\u0103 ce s\u0103 fac cu declara\u021bia \u00een cas\u0103, c\u0103 e prea scor\u021boas\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 \u0219terg la cur? A\u0219tept pe cineva, zic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bine, a\u0219tepta\u021bi, dar apoi s\u0103 merge\u021bi s\u0103 schimba\u021bi declara\u021bia, da?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Da, bine. Mersi, c\u0103 am voie s\u0103 a\u0219tept.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fraieric\u0103, pe care te-o \u00eembr\u0103cat m\u0103-ta cu noroi c\u00e2nd d\u0103deai la porci, eu n-am avut ocazia asta. Mi-a\u0219 fi dorit. Eu am tremurat de frig \u0219i-am m\u00e2ncat c\u00e2ndva terci de f\u0103in\u0103 de gr\u00e2u \u0219i cu sare. Fluieric\u0103 care crezi c\u0103 te-o pus statul \u00een buricul staulului oilor, \u0219tiu, te-or pus pentru c\u0103 trebuia s\u0103 avem \u0219i ciom\u0103gi\u0219ti. Am mai mult\u0103 \u0219coal\u0103 dec\u00e2t ai tu via\u021b\u0103, crenguric\u0103 care \u00eemi ceri declara\u021bie la domiciliu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
La bloc, la aprox 10 metri de scar\u0103, un alt ofuscat, din satul m\u0103gura cretinilor, cred c\u0103 acela\u0219i, p\u0103 sar\u0103, ca s\u0103 \u00een\u021beleag\u0103 \u0219i neamul lui, m\u0103 opre\u0219te \u0219i \u00eemi cere declara\u021bie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
E p\u0103 prisp\u0103, zic. Poftim? Da, e p\u0103 prisp\u0103, stau acolo, la zece metri, sunt cu ciob\u0103nescul german, nu-l vede\u021bi, a\u0219teptam c\u0103catul \u0219i pi\u0219atul lui?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Nu e bine, zice, ofuscatul. Buletin? Nu s\u0103 mai exist\u0103 buletine, zic. CI? Poftim, ce-i aia? Carte de identitate. Aaaaa. Am. O aduc imediat. Nu-i bine, zice ofuscatul. Sunt la 10 metri, domnul, aduc \u0219i diplomele dac\u0103 vre\u021bi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Nu-i bine, ofuscatul!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
B\u0103i, prietene, ofusca\u021bii din dealul \u00een care m\u0103-ta s-o futut cu to\u021bi cretinii, te-or repartizat aici, la mine, ca \u0219\u0103-\u0219i bat\u0103 joc de tine, dar or uitat s\u0103-\u021bi taie limba, c\u0103 altfel nu te puneai cu limba mea, a str\u0103mo\u0219ilor mei. S\u0103 te fereasc\u0103 universul dac\u0103 vrea s\u0103 te m\u00e2nce, c\u0103 te fac varz\u0103 \u0219i te arunc la porci. Cum le zicea? Aaaa, l\u0103turi. C\u00e2t mai tr\u0103iesc. \u0218i ultima lui vorb\u0103, \u0103la e ciob\u0103nesc german? Serios? M-ai \u00eentrebat asta? B\u0103, tu chiar e\u0219ti cretin?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
B\u0103i, fraieric\u0103, eu sunt de acord cu reguli, c\u0103 Anglia nu a avut reguli, dar tu parc\u0103 erai hitlerist. Ce-i cu tine?!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
M\u0103 opre\u0219te mutulic\u0103. Declafrac\u021bie ave\u021bi? Da, zic. Merg s\u0103 cump\u0103r ni\u0219te pemp\u0103r\u0219i. De mo\u0219negi. 5 aprilie. Eu am scris patru. Mor\u021bii \u0219i r\u0103ni\u021bii, eu a\u0219a am crezut! C\u0103-i 4 aprilie. C\u0103c\u0103narul, nu-i bine, e cinci. A\u0219a, \u0219i? Eu am crezut, toat\u0103 ziua c\u0103-i 4. Nu-i patru, nu sunte\u021bi \u00een regul\u0103. Zicea-i c\u0103-i hitlerist. Serios? Un […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9310,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1111,1097,834],"tags":[1109,1096,91],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\n
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