Am cunoscut oameni. Mul\u021bi oameni. Trec\u00e2nd prin via\u021b\u0103. Unii erau b\u0103rba\u021bi, al\u021bii se d\u0103deau femei. Pro\u0219ti, de\u0219tep\u021bi, faini, hido\u0219i, cumsecade, alinta\u021bi, coio\u0219i \u0219i fi\u021bo\u0219i, curve, mame, simandico\u0219i, s\u0103lbatici sau prea moi, cert este c\u0103 to\u021bi, dar absolut to\u021bi, se trag din specia om. \u0218i dup\u0103 toatea astea, c\u00e2te au fost, cu oamenii \u0103\u0219tia, diferi\u021bi, desigur, un lucru n-am reu\u0219it s\u0103 \u00een\u021beleg nicicum. Adic\u0103telea, dac\u0103 vrei s\u0103 prive\u0219ti \u00een ochi un om care \u021bi-a c\u0103zut cu tronc, ca om, nu pentru pat sau sex cu biciuri \u0219i orgii, nu ai voie, dac\u0103 ai consoart\u0103 sau b\u0103rbat, c\u0103 dac\u0103 ie frumos \u0219i d\u0103\u0219tept (omul, femeie sau b\u0103rbat) ie periculos \u0219i se genereaz\u0103 inevitabil gelozie \u0219i instabilitate familial\u0103. Adic\u0103telea, femeile \u0219i b\u0103rba\u021bii frumo\u0219i ie responsabili de gelozie?! Adic\u0103telea, dac\u0103 vrei s\u0103 cuno\u0219ti un om, \u00een afara minunatei c\u0103snicii de c\u0103cat pe care \u021bi-o p\u0103ze\u0219ti cu surle, tobe, saltimbaci, spioni \u0219i slugi ieftine, trebuie s\u0103 dovede\u0219ti c\u0103 omul pe care urmeaz\u0103 s\u0103-l prezin\u021bi minunatei tale familii cu sclavi numi\u021bi so\u021bii, so\u021bi, copchii, bastarzi \u0219i alte cele, este un h\u00e2d, retard, eunuc \u0219i mut, dac\u0103 se poate, c\u0103 altfel ie periculos pentru stabilimentul fragil al familiei tale? Adic\u0103telea, io nu prea \u00een\u021beleg. A\u0219a-i? Chiar a\u0219a-i? Nu-i a\u0219a c\u0103 via\u021ba-i fabuloas\u0103? Te \u00eensori, m\u0103ri\u021bi, te iei, \u00een general, cu un alt om, \u0219i din momentul \u0103la nu mai ai voie s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi dai seama, nici \u00een ruptul capului c\u0103 s\u0103 ezist\u0103 \u0219i al\u021bi oameni p\u0103 planet\u0103. Adic\u0103telea, juri la altar s\u0103 mori uitat, uituc, morm\u0103ind a prost, t\u00e2mpit, dement, singuratic \u0219i iubitor de partenerul vie\u021bii tale de c\u0103cat cu perje. Adic\u0103telea, c\u00e2nd te ostoie\u0219ti lu\u00e2nd pe cineva n-ai voie s\u0103 mai respiri dec\u00e2t azot, amoniac, acid sulfuric, monocotiledonate, trifazicul \u0219i ciucurii sunt bonus? N-am spus nimic aici? Pesemne c\u0103 da. Adic\u0103telea, tu nu cite\u0219ti printre r\u00e2nduri? E\u0219ti luat? Adic\u0103telea, te-ai \u00eensurat ca s\u0103-\u021bi p\u0103ze\u0219ti nevasta? Te angaja\u0219i paznic la pizd\u0103? Adic\u0103telea, unii \u00ee\u021bi fut muierea din priviri \u0219i vorbe, sim\u021bi tu cum soa\u021ba ta draga se \u00eenfinge v\u00e2rtos \u00eentr-o pul\u0103 atunci c\u00e2nd un oarecare om \u00eei spune c\u0103-i frumoas\u0103 \u0219i de\u0219teapt\u0103, proasta dracului? Adic\u0103telea, \u021bi se mice\u0219te pu\u021bulica dac\u0103 un nea omul de la franzel\u0103rie \u00eei spune proastei tale c\u0103-i o femeie delicat\u0103 \u0219i mam\u0103 grijulie cu plozii t\u0103i retarda\u021bi? \u00centreb \u0219i io. A\u0219a-i?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Capitolul 1, unicul<\/s><\/strong>, c\u0103-i doar unul primul<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Deun\u0103zi am dat peste un ins. Adic\u0103telea, l-am cunoscut personal, adic\u0103 st\u0103tea st\u0103tut \u00een fa\u021ba mea ca un taur eunuc care holbeaz\u0103 ochii la pizda vacii \u0219i nu \u0219tie cum s\u0103 procedeze \u0219i se \u0219i \u00eentreab\u0103, \u00een nemernicia lui, avem o pizd\u0103, ce facem cu ea? \u0218i l-am cunoscut. \u0218i am cunoscut-o \u0219i pe muieresa. O toant\u0103, dar fain\u0103, cu ochii mari c\u00e2t cepele flendur\u00e2ndu-\u0219i nurii dup\u0103 un b\u0103rbat, c\u0103 pe \u0103la de l\u00e2ng\u0103 ea nici un gibon nu cred c\u0103 l-ar fi adoptat. Brusc, insul cu preten\u021bii de gibon, se uita pe sub spr\u00e2ncene, mai mult la mine dec\u00e2t la nefututa de l\u00e2ng\u0103 el. Mi-am zis, m\u0103 place omul, acum m\u0103 cucere\u0219te, are un ritual anume pentru zeii din via\u021ba lui. Nu, domne, ieram intrus, adic\u0103 mi-o spus cu subiect \u0219i predicat, ia ie nevasta mea, mare grij\u0103. V\u0103d, i-am spus, \u0219i a\u0219a \u00eemi doresc s\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103, pe veci \u0219i pururi \u0219i amin \u0219i definitiv \u0219i iremediabil. \u0218i-am plecat. Adic\u0103telea, b\u0103h, a\u0219a o fi?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Am cunoscut oameni. Mul\u021bi oameni. Trec\u00e2nd prin via\u021b\u0103. Unii erau b\u0103rba\u021bi, al\u021bii se d\u0103deau femei. Pro\u0219ti, de\u0219tep\u021bi, faini, hido\u0219i, cumsecade, alinta\u021bi, coio\u0219i \u0219i fi\u021bo\u0219i, curve, mame, simandico\u0219i, s\u0103lbatici sau prea moi, cert este c\u0103 to\u021bi, dar absolut to\u021bi, se trag din specia om.\u0218i dup\u0103 toatea astea, c\u00e2te au fost, cu oamenii \u0103\u0219tia, diferi\u021bi, desigur, un […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":10744,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1153],"tags":[39,1159,1084],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\n
Prieteni, dar s\u0103 fie h\u00e2d \u0219i retardat, dac\u0103 se poate - Blog<\/title>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\n\n\t\n\t\n\t\n